Choose a Girl

Maybe you’ll discover a mutual kink that spices up your sex life. Consensual spanking and light bondage can add an intense edge to your sexual talk. What dirty talk isn’t is some mysterious language. While it might seem like something straight out of erotic literature or a steamy movie scene, it’s useful for elevating communication in the bedroom. These are just a small sample of dirty things that you can say to your guy to turn him and make sex a lot hotter for the both of you.

If you think you ‘messed up’ or just aren’t feeling it

So if you want to seduce a girl and talk dirty to her, you need to do more than just dress up as a fireman. “Little signals or texts or messages can help ensure that by the time you’re getting physical with someone, the dirty talk will just feel like a natural progression,” says Eros. If you find dirty talk cringey because of how blunt or matter-of-fact it can be, Eros recommends focusing less on what you’re saying and more on why you’re saying it. You’re communicating to a partner that you desire them, or you want them to feel good, or you want them to make you feel a certain way—and the dirty words and phrases are just a means to achieving that end.

How to Talk Dirty, According to 3 Sex Experts (Because You Know You’re Curious)

• Maybe something that you qualify as ‘dirty talk’ is something the other person might find offensive, silly, or straight up insane, and vice versa.
• And yet, in the heat of the sexual moment, dirty talk can be arousing for many—that is, if you know what dirty things to say during sex to get you and your partner going (more on that below).
• This isn’t some weird sex monologue; you don’t have to talk the whole time.
• Just communicate exactly what happened or what you’re feeling and ask for what you want (or need) to happen next.
• Create anticipation.Part of the appeal of talking dirty is the anticipation of what’s to, well, come.
• While talking dirty seems to come easily to some people, for the rest of us, it can feel (extremely) awkward and unnatural—especially when we first get started.

“Use language that comes naturally to you, as opposed to repeating what you have seen in films or read online,” O’Reilly says. As Bethany Ricciardi, sex expert at Too Timid explains, people often also get turned on by hearing that a partner has these steamy thoughts about them. BLAC® is the premier lifestyle magazine for African Americansin and around Detroit. We cover the people,places and issues of importance to our community.

• You don’t need to be an expert to talk dirty, but if you’re nervous, taking cues from experts can boost your confidence.
• But feedback is another way of sharing what you’re feeling in the moment.
• So we asked relationship experts for their best tips on how to talk dirty, plus dirty-talk ideas for both beginners and seasoned pros alike looking to take their game to the next level.
• “In a relationship, trust is incredibly sexy,” she finishes.

Keep The Conversation Playful

At first, talking dirty can feel awkward, clumsy or even embarrassing. But once you realize it’s just extra, sexy level of communication with your man it can heat your sexual life up more than you ever imagined. One of the secrets to great dirty talk isn’t just what you say, but how you say it. Try to keep your voice low and the delivery slow (without, you know, sounding like you’re trying to impersonate someone) to build the anticipation.

This practice will make experimenting with dirty talk easier during sex,” says Rullo. Test the waters.If you aren’t sure that your partner will be into dirty talk, try it once or twice casually during sex to see what their response is—you might be surprised. Reading is sexy.Erotic literature is a goldmine for dirty talk. It’s kind of like having training wheels until you feel confident enough to ditch the book and fly solo. You can’t just talk dirty to a man without knowing the psychology behind why it needs to be done.

Instead, think of a way of saying it that makes you feel a little more you. You can start off by trying a few slightly dirty things and then work your way up to your preferred amount of filth. Like anything worth doing well, it usually takes a bit of practice to build your confidence up. Getting started with dirty talk via text can feel a lot less intimidating than talking dirty IRL, so practicing with some sexting is a great way to get comfortable with the idea. Having the added distance of a screen can also make it easier to speak up if your partner says something that doesn’t work for you. It’s all about the delivery.One of the secrets to great dirty talk isn’t just what you say, but how you say it.

Unless he has insane goofball rizz, it might not land right. Talking dirty is a thrilling way to enhance your sexual connection with your partner. But if you’re fumbling up your tongue tango, it can quickly deflate the mood (not to mention other things).

Sending your man dirty sexy messages when you’re not together is a great way to keep him thinking about you and to build sexual tension with him. You can send these any way you like (Facebook, text, email, Snapchat, etc.). Check out the chapter dedicated to sending your man sexy dirty text messages here if you want an in-depth guide on this. There can be a world to explore within dirty talking, and it can be an intimate way to share your sexual fantasies with someone.

It helps you develop more sexual self-confidence. It helps your partner learn what you like, and lowers their performance anxiety. It’s also a low-stress way to play with fantasies.